If Mama Ain’t Happy (the anger series) 

I want ya’ll to know that I’m writing this first paragraph, last. As I’ve written this post, I’ve yelled once, triggered from an 8 year old’s terrible attitude toward a simple task. I’ve stopped myself from yelling a bunch more times and it’s not even 10:00 am.  The struggle is real folks. I know I’m noalone….now onto the real post…

I post a lot about being a happy and joyful mom. But, I will be the first to tell you that I struggle, daily, with anger and reactions to my kids’ mistakes and bad judgements.  I’ve been crying out to God for 8 years, since my first child was two and my second was new born. Eight loooong years of my mistakes and my heart being exposed to these precious little people. 

Sometimes, in certain seasons, I feel I am winning in this battle. I’m patient, can keep a clear head in moments of setback and chaos and can calm myself. Other days I feel I’m back to square one. Lately, The Hubster and I have been making more of an effort, together, to not yell. Frankly, yelling is scary for the kids and makes our home feel terrible.  But, the girls have both commented how they see that we are trying to stop and how it has been better.

But, a truth has been emerging, slowly, during these eight years of heart grief over the mistakes I’ve made. I’ve come to the realization that God is very interested both in heart healing and in the process of it all. He is more than able to heal someone of anger in an instant, but the battle is not about anger. 

It is about exposing the lies that you believe. 

The lies can go deep. They are often in our subconscious. But, God has a way of uncovering the buried thoughts, exposing the bones, and making those bones fill with truth and dance with life. 

Anger is a symptom of lies we believe. These lies can be ones that run deep within our culture. It doesn’t matter what tribe or nation you were born in, we all struggle with lies and anger to some degree. 

But take heart for Jesus has overcome. You are more than a victor through Christ. And your children are in the palm of his hand. 

I’m going to do an anger series and uncover some of the lies I have believed about myself, motherhood and others. Maybe you can join me on this journey? Anger is a theif and I’m here to stop it from being passed on to my children’s children. I cannot do this alone. 

All human help is useless. With God’s help, we will do mighty things. Psalm 60:12

In the end, what we need, friends, is not another parenting book, another blog post on how to stop anger, another seminar or sermon, we desperately need the love of Jesus to fill us to overflowing and the Holy Spirit to expose, in the moment, what lies we are believing. 

Accountability and friendship are great companions on this journey, but no one can walk this road for you. It’s straight up Jesus and you.  

Join me as I talk about some of the lies that I’ve battled and am killing. I’m doing it for my family. Why are you? 

Know you are loved, fully, right where you are in your journey.  You are loved so, so much. The more we can let that truth sink in, the easier this will be. 

Love always, 



2 thoughts on “If Mama Ain’t Happy (the anger series) ”

  1. Frustration can certainly make us into someone we’re not and yet that part of us is still us. I’m glad you are working on it and that your girl is noticing such a change. It’s a normal part of being human which allows us to express how we feel and you’re teaching your kids it is safe to vent.

    Whenever my boy gets really upset, and this helps me immensely too, we play a game we call “Alphabet Game” and it’s simply going through the letters of the alphabet saying a word that comes to mind. It’s often a challenge as we make our way through one letter to the next, especially if it’s a themed one (marine life, zoo animals, fruits, etc). It’s a teaching moment in many ways and then we can take a step back and talk about what bothered us initially.

    I wish you faith and a path of ease, Kelly. Thank you for sharing yourself.

    Sarah Butland


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